Special

L: Is Papa special?
Me: yep
L: why?
Me: well, do you think I’m special?
L: Yeah
Me: why?
L: because you’re a little bit pretty. And you’re nice and you like to play with me. And you’re calm and I like going to the mailbox with you.
Me: Ok. So what makes papa special?
L: he’s really cool and he has a sword in his office.
Me: nice
L: And Zara is extremely special.
Me: why?
L: because she’s very breakable. And she’s my sister.
Me: yeah. What makes you special?
L: I’m really cool.
Me: that’s cool.
L: yeah. Everyone in our family is the most special in the universe. I think.

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All my fault

Legend is sick tonight. He has been crying off and on. In the midst of his frustration, he cried, “This is all my fault!”

Me: What? What do you mean honey? It’s not your fault.

Legend: (crying)I should have been more careful about germs! I shouldn’t have kept putting my fingers in my mouth at school and licking my shoe!

Me: oh… well, yeah that was probably not a good idea. But even people who are super careful about germs still get sick. Don’t be too mad at yourself. Did you know your body is learning how to fight off your disease right now? Isn’t that cool?

Legend: It’s not really cool but I guess it kind of is… :-/

Bubblegum

Legend: Mom!! Did you see that??!!!!
Me: no, what?
Legend: I just blew a bubble as big as the ones that those strange, pretty girls who blow bubbles do!
Me: wow, that’s awesome (LOL)
Legend: Are those girls or women?

Good question.

Mind control

Legend: Where is my underjam?
Me: It’s LITERALLY right next to you
Legend: Do you know why you said that?
Me: No…? What do you mean?
Legend: Promise you won’t laugh?
Me: yes
Legend : You said that because Angelina mind controlled you. It wasn’t exactly mind control, but basically that’s what it was.
Me: (I promised not to laugh)…. (keep it together)… wow, that’s crazy
Legend: I know.

Do Your Thing!

(Getting ready for bed. Legend is standing at the toilet.)

Me: Ok, please try to get all of your pee out. Don’t hold it in, ok?

Legend: Ok, ok…

(Legend bends over and whispers something in the direction of his private parts)

Me: What are you doing?

Legend: (starts giggling) I’m talking to my penis!

Me: (laughing) What did you say?

Legend: I said, “Come on penis, do your thing!” (laughter, laughter, laughter)

He still doesn’t go. He puts his UnderJam on and his jammies. Two minutes later, he runs into the living room, his face lit up – “Mom! My penis did its thing!”

(Laughter ensues.)

A Character

(The four of us are hanging out. Zara and Micah are snuggling.)

Legend: Maybe the boys should take care of the boys and the girls should take care of the girls. So Daddy takes care of me and Mommy takes care of Zara. Could we do that?

Micah: We could…

Legend: I bet there are some people who actually do that. But that would be far, far too hard for me.

Me: (laughing) Who are you?

Legend: I’m a CHARACTER!

Raising a Legend

So I have recently departed from Facebook, and heard disappointment from family and friends because they aren’t seeing any posts about my conversations with Legend. Then I realized – what better use for this dusty old blog? So, if you are interested in staying in the Legendary Loop, please subscribe to the blog. Feel free to share it with others. Also, if you have any name suggestions for the blog, please post it in the comments below!

Here is a fun little nugget from today…

(Driving in the car)

Legend: Mom, what does “according” mean?

Me: Um… that is really hard to explain. But it means that you have a guide for something you are doing or thinking about. Like if Grandma said that the sky is blue, you could say, “According to Grandma, the sky is blue.” That means that Grandma thinks that the sky is blue. Another example is if I said, “Arrange your cars according to their color,” then you would sort the cars out by color, putting all the blue cars together, all the red cars together, you know.

Legend: Okay. I get it. So what does “to my research” mean?

Me: (laughing) So you are trying to figure out what “according to my research” means? Where did you hear that?

Legend: It’s hard to say.

Me: Okay well, that means that you believe something is true because you have seen it happen or you have read about it.

Legend: Oh ok. Well, according to my research, when volcanoes have little rocks fall in them, and everything starts jiggling around, and it jiggles more and more, and more rocks fall in, then the volcano will EXPLODE! … Is that a good example?

Me: Yes. Yes it is.